The Blah Factor and The Unmarked Package

I’ll bet if I tracked all of my posts in the past year, my blah moods would be consistently at the same time every month. This month, I blame a number of things on this blah-ness:

1. My age: Let’s face it. I am going to be 40 in October. Okay, October 2014 but still. It’s an uncomfortable topic but hormones suck. For three days a month I get really bad, really painful acne around my chin and neckline. No, I do not take and/or post pics of myself those days. What is really odd is that the acne disappears as fast as it appears. Very gross. Very disgusting.

2. Allergies: Allergy season has rendered me useless for the past month or so. I can’t breathe most days and when I do break down and take some meds, it knocks me out. I am useless either way. A friend of mine gave me a natural herb yesterday that starts with a Q (no internet access while I am sitting outside of the kid’s karate studio, I’m afraid). It appeared to work but honestly, you could give me Skittles and said it was Advil. My body is easily duped.

3. Missing my husband: R doesn’t have a trip planned out here any time soon. So sad. Very sad. Which leads me to number 4.

4. Diet and exercise: Any break in routine messes me up. The middle girl A has had a fever since last night. She will have to spend the day with Grandma tomorrow while I sub in the boy’s class. Which means if I don’t set aside time tomorrow to work out, I will be crankier than usual quite cranky.

R is a great cook and honestly when we first started dating, I told him I didn’t know how. Hey, I had to keep his standards low, right? R later told me that my father pulled him aside before our rehearsal dinner and said,

“Are you sure you want to marry her? She doesn’t cook and she can’t clean.”

Seriously. He said that.

Thanks, Dad. (Had to keep his standards low too, I suppose.)

I don’t want to cook. I admit it.

BUT… I also don’t want our kids to drown in preservatives and sugar so I keep their standards low by rarely taking them out to eat and relying on simple meals. Top Ramen, anyone? Preservatives in that, I know, but you can’t beat a 27 cent meal for three and you can also add a couple of eggs or some shrimp for protein.

Today I went to a local grocery outlet where I learned the hard way that I would never JUST TRY frozen food from there without actually being familiar with the brand. Okay, beef and broccoli is already bad when not fresh but ew. That brand was nasty.

I did find frozen mangos and made mango smoothies. It tasted A LOT like mango lassi. I remember trying to make some before with yogurt, fresh mangos, and a bit of sugar. It DID NOT TASTE like the delicious concoctions at our favorite Indian restaurants. Then I tried something else.

I threw the following in an unplugged blender (because once you’ve plugged one in while it was actually switched on, you never ever want to do that again):

* half a cup of plain Greek yogurt
* 2 cups of frozen mangos (look, these are from the Philippines)


* a can of mango nectar. (I got this one from the Mexican food aisle from a different grocery store)


It makes about three cups, pretty big servings for the kids. I wanted to take a picture of it because it was too much for L but the boy downed the rest of it before I could!

Also from the store, I treated myself to some things.

Gel nail polish

Remember I had acrylics on a few months ago? Well, I had to put that expensive habit to rest but the process left my nails brittle so I decided to give these a whirl. I get gel nails when I go to the salon and my nails never chipped. It was this color and a florescent orange but not in a good way. This blue has a little sparkle in it. I like that it is almost gray.

Dry shampoo
I know you are supposed to only shampoo and condition your hair a couple of times a week but I am a mess after I work out. I don’t trust water to get rid of all the greasies so I’m gonna try this. I had a different, MORE EXPENSIVE bottle from Ulta for twenty bucks. This bigger bottle was three dollars.

Silicone baking pan pads

You are lol-ing because you read how I want and need to eat better and move more. I know you are. I am too but please understand that I only bake on special occaisions now such as a picnic or when we have company as opposed to every weekend because it was the weekend, woo hoo!.

We just got home from the karate studio and there is a package in the mail for my husband. It is a rectangular prism like a frame or a book. It even is stamped “MEDIA: SUBJECT TO INSPECTION” all over it. But here’s are a couple of weird things: Not only is his last name spelled wrong (it’s a completely different but similar last name), our address is the return address.

The boy looks at it and asked a bazillion questions. “Who is it from? Is Daddy expecting a package? What if it’s a bomb? Remember we heard all of those things we heard on the news about bombs being sent through the mail?”

I sigh. Still, I don’t want to take any chances. I call my husband who has been asleep for a couple of hours on the east coast. No answer. I called him again to rouse him from his slumber.

Still no answer.

My kid is panicking. “Mommy, you should just throw it away. Just throw it away! It’s a bomb!”

I said, “Okay, alright. I will throw it away.” I set the package on the garbage can outside our house.

Still, I was curious.

So I waited until the kids go in the house and little by little, I start tearing at the package. Tape, tape, and more tape. I saw no mysterious powder so I kept opening…

2 thoughts on “The Blah Factor and The Unmarked Package

  1. I have not done the vegetarian thing yet. I’ll probably do it next spring when hubby deploys, maybe this fall if my schedule gets less hetic so I can go to the grocery more often 🙂

  2. Pingback: The Unmarked Package Explanation « navywifechronicles

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